Reiko Aylesworth, Steven Pasquale, Johnny Lewis, Shareeka Epps
Greg Strause, Colin Strause
20th Century Fox
"Aliens vs. Predator- Requiem" Review
I will give "Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem" credit for truth in advertising.
This Christmas there was certainly no peace at the box-office when this mind-bogglingly unnecessary sequel to "Aliens vs. Predator" hit the theatres on Christmas Day in all its R-rated glory.
By now, any memory of the original alien or predator is long gone, and all that is left is the awareness that Hollywood is so completely desperate for box-office that it will mine the depths of even its woefully bad, but modestly successful at the box-office, films.
One could have hoped for a semblance of life from "AVPR," as I shall not so affectionately call the film. After all, it seemed to up the ante by ignoring the PG-13 rating and going all out for the R.
What a waste.
The simple reality is I expected very little from the film, having been incredibly unimpressed by "AVP" and being acutely aware that this film wasn't screened for critics. Hence, filmmakers knew they had a crappy film and were targeting mostly gorehounds who really, quite honestly, don't give a rat's ass about a quality script, decent acting or, well, anything much beyond horror or gore or graphic violence.
I can't fathom, however, that even gorehounds are going to find much to enjoy with "AVPR," a film so poorly acted, weakly scripted and ineptly shot that it's almost impossible to stay focused on the film.
I'm trying to work up the nerve to describe the storyline to you, but I keep snickering as I think about writing it down. Essentially, we have a spaceship crash land in Colorado with an Alien/Predator hybrid guy who goes wild on board and, thus the guys go wild on this Colorado town and, well, this sequel's incredibly generic cast goes through a wide variety of emotions ranging from boredom to apathy to cluelessness.
Oh wait, you mean there are other emotions?
Rieko Aylesworth ("24") leads the cast, which also includes such fine household names as John Ortiz, Steven Pasquale, Johnny Lewis and a few others who are mostly too darkly lit to see largely owing to the worst lighting job in any film I've seen in 2007.
The obligatory climactic battle is a pathetic letdown, and even the human/creature interactions have a sort of pathetic "been there, seen that" feel to them.
The Strause Brothers, Colin and Greg (never to be confused with Ethan and Joel, ya' know), direct the film. Truthfully, that's about all I can say about it...They do direct the film. No, they really do.
The film may possibly appeal to those with a bit of a cruel streak inside them, as a couple scenes will leave you scratching your head going "Not only is that tastelessly mean, but it's utterly pointless."
If this review feels rather cavalier, casual and haphazardly written, then you've just experienced what I felt like watching "Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem," one of 2007's last of the deserving Razzie nominees for Worst Picture.