If you've been around film for any length of time, you've likely found yourself finishing up a film and wondering to yourself "How the heck did they pitch that film?"

Such is the premise for writer/director Vin Nucatola's 9-minute short film Italian Turtles, a frequently funny parody short centered around the central idea of what it must've been like to pitch the idea of a film about, um, a certain collection of beloved ninja turtles. 

Please don't tell me I have to actually say it. 

The film stars Nick Piacente and Chris D'Amato as the two pitchsters, two ordinary looking chaps whom it would seem are out of their league when they sit down in a non-descript room opposite Timothy J. Cox's John Handy and his cohorts in cinematic crime, Karl (Bj Gruber) and Pat (Janel Koloski), whose bewilderment at this absurd proposal turns to increasingly weirder inspiration as the film goes on. 

There's never any doubt that we're dealing with a parody here, from our initial sighting of Piacente's hilariously awful fake stache to Cox's over-the-top spin on John Handy, the kind of guy you could exactly picture sitting in some studio boardroom somewhere finding inspiration in the most godawful ideas - and ending up being right. The film's ensemble cast is strong across the board including Mary Ortega's brief appearance as a secretary who fuels just a wee bit more inspiration. 

Italian Turtles is a quick, breezy film that snags its laugh then wraps things up. Behind a quality cast and Nucatola's quirky, fun dialogue it's definitely a film worth checking out. 

Written by Richard Propes
The Independent Critic